When it’s time to surrender

Thank goodness it is Friday!
Believe me when I say I love what I do and I made the choice to balance working,  being a mummy ( very thankful for our gifts) and a wife of a fifo husband.
But I’m really feeling it at the moment.  I’m tired and my whole body hurts.

I have been a mummy for 23 years , which is nearly half my life and believe me I am thankful for the gift of our 5 kids every day.

It has taken me years to realise that I can’t be a good Mum and wife if I don’t look after myself. For a long time I was the mummy martyr soldier.  Doing everything then whinging to Mr T + T about my exhaustion.  The whinging wife (do you know her?) because shameful to admit it was me.  For years I was told to take some timeout for me by Mr T + T and friends.

Unfortunately mummy martyrs get sick as well and when your balancing work,parenting and being a fifo wife the walls can come crashing down with a bang.

This Mummy Martyr found out the hard way last year when our Miss Moo (2) had a long run of illnesses that always seemed to happen when Mr T + T was away.
I soldiered on until I became very ill at the same time as Miss Moo was recovering from the flu.  I didn’t ask for Mr T + T to come home I soldiered on until he came home and I crashed.
Medical advice finally conquered all and my pride was crushed as I was told that I had to slow down and make changes if I wanted to be here to see my beautiful kids grow up.

What a slap in the face that was.  How the hell was I going to make changes?  Who would do all the jobs I did?
As Henny Penny said ‘The sky is falling ‘,  or in my case it was going to fall.

Long story cut short , it was a journey that saw Mr T & T and my older kids disarm me and force me to stand down from my post.

Fast forward to this week and changes have been made.
Yesterday I snuck off after work before anyone could catch me before picking Miss Moo up to get a neck,  shoulder and feet massage.  Being the cheapskate I am I went to the local Chinese massage place and it was great.  I came out minus the headache I had carried for the last week and not clenching my teeth.
Today our eldest daughter is coming over to play with Miss Moo while I get a much needed haircut ( time to control the fluffy fro) and on Sunday I am going to the movies with a friend.

image

Yes I have a long list of jobs to get done but I’m taking some time to unravel and step back from my post so that I can be a better Mummy.

Nagging self doubts,  you can take a hike.  My Mummy comrades I hope you get to take a breather no matter how small.  Most of all if you need help ask for it ( it’s ok to)  and if you don’t get it shout.  Over and out.

Enjoy the moments

Jules 💜